One of the many blessings of hardship is that it brings us closer to the good ones in our life. We find our soul family when we see who shows up when things get messy. And the added bonus is that our friendship is changed by the opportunity for depth- it expands, develops, matures and gets juicier.
Years ago I used to shield my friends from knowing the struggles I was going through. I felt like a burden to be anything less than pleasant and “well put together” (#internalizedpatriarchy ) After all, who was I to take up space? To ask for help or even need help? (Also #enneagram2 )
It took a lot of repatterning and reparenting to loosen up to a place where I could comfortably be vulnerable with my people and even ask for help.
When I started to open up more to them, especially about my struggles as a new mom and later on during my marital crisis, I realized that I had been withholding myself from my dearest friends and family. That I had been robbing them of the chance to really know all of me and to love and support all of me.
I count my blessings to have a solid soul family in my life. We have seen each other through divorces, family deaths, addiction struggles, postpartum depression, cancer...the works. And with each tidal wave that surges through one of our lives, we get a chance to show up, listen, hold space for grief, clean a house, swoop up a baby from a tired mama’s arms, bring a meal to feed one that’s too exhausted to feed themselves, and love our dear friends through their ache without any aim to take away their experience, fix it or minimize it.
Hold your soul family close. Show up for them and let them show up for you. Give them the gift of your fullness. Return the love and support generously.